oops....

i did this....

because....

i have had my hair in a ponytail AFTER i had it done for a week straight

.....

i am a hormonal nursing mother

....

i bleached my hair 9 months ago and was still suffering from the consequences

....

it seemed to be the only thing i was controlling in my life

take your pick which reason fits best.

i don't like it.

but i didn't like it before either.

so lose, lose

now if you ask me i am going with reason # 4 [control] because what a whirlwind life can be.

although i love being a mom, it is not a planned out affair and everyday holds a different story for me. why else do i not feel in control?

we're moving.

where you ask?

well no where i want to move.

basically there are only 2 places i want to move [a house here or utah]

my odds weren't good in that department anyway...

but we will now be residents of the north bay.

[well 95% sure]

so the roots we've finally put down?

rip them out.

my cheer job i love?

gone and me leaving them high and dry.

company for new mother while husband is working crazy hours?

non-existent.

distance from things familiar and airport?

far.

now you have my bleak outlook and push for a change in my hair, a change i controlled.

this is a really good career move for nate, a dream move actually

and

bizarre how things work out

i know my heavenly father's will is in this

and as hard as pitiful me thinks this is

i know this is somewhere we're supposed to go.

now having spilled all those beans and dried my eyes

that's all for tonight....

tomorrow i promise more of this

and his 5 week stats!

and this makes me happy too

(i'm sure you'll need to watch it after reading this)